Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
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