This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
He kissed a someone with a penis
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
Randomize
