Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
Randomize
