I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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