im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
Randomize
