So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
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