You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
I forget how to act sober
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize
