The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
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