You were right, I'm so drunk and I want to eat the shit out of my vanilla cupcake candle it smells delish
Experience is the best teacher
C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
Randomize
