Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
I'm eating all of the evidence.
and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
so let's talk penis.
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
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