I forgot how hot balto sounded
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
Randomize
