TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
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