4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
porn star boner night. come get it.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Randomize
