dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
Randomize
