I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
Randomize
