the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
Randomize
