We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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