I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
Are my feet made of real feet?
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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