when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
It's just like the Real World with babies
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
