Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
Randomize
