You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
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