sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
Randomize
