hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
Randomize