D3 body, D1 cock
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
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