every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
Randomize
