At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
Randomize
