So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
Randomize
