The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Randomize
