I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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