This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
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