PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
