White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize
