I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
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