Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
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