Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
The best revenge is premature balding
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
Randomize