there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
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