I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
People with herpes should wear stickers.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Randomize
