He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
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