tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
Randomize
