Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
Randomize
