How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
