Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
Randomize
