your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
Randomize
