OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
