Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
my vag is so smooth its legendary
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
