my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
