so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
Randomize
