All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
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