I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
i out mim tonsoeep
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
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