We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
