i don't plan on having that self control this summer
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
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