its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
