it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Randomize
